Visitor

I was unsure of it, but I know now. There is someone inside my house. Each night they humor themselves with tapping, ever so slightly, on my bedroom door. I don't dare look out and see who it is...I know who it is.
I was hoping He'd lose interest, or that Alice would somehow convince Him otherwise. But He is patient. I can't leave and go outside; the crows still remind me they are watching, they caw in their enormous flocks-their murders-and wait for me to appear.

I will try to wait Him out, for now. I can only hope His patience does not wear thin.

...As for Alice, I don't see why I wait for her to do anything. She has been silent since her last post and has left no way for me to contact her. Perhaps she's found her way into some schizophrenic stupor and gotten herself killed.

Locked In

I haven't paid attention to the dates, all the holidays passed without my notice. I've lost contact with any family and lost hope with finding Robbie. I don't care where he is. I tried to clear my mind, tried to tell myself that this badness would pass. I decided to take a walk around the town, telling myself that everything could be logically explained. But as I walked..the birds. The crows, the damned crows began to perch themselves on the houses and telephones wires. They sat wherever they chose and followed me. I made my way safely back home, but I hear them migrating outside. They've been cawing for hours nonstop, it won't be long until they start to try to get inside. I'll have to clean them off my windows, but it is apparent it won't be long now..I can't get outside. I hate birds, how I ever liked them in the first place remains a mystery to me.

Dreaming

I woke up today from a very strange dream. It has been a long time since I have had any dream at all, which is why I find it of interest. The dream itself was simple enough, I was standing in the middle of a road, and on either side of me were lines of telephone poles. Sitting crowded together on the wires of these poles were hundreds upon hundreds of birds, I think they may have been crows. I began to walk down the street, and as I did the birds began to watch me, their heads following wherever I went. I continued to walk down the street, when suddenly I came to the end, or at least I couldn't walk any further. I turned around, and watched as all of the crows on the wire suddenly began to melt off of the wires, becoming black pools.
The dream unsettled me greatly at first; I remember I spent the morning making sure Roc and Robbie were alright, which they were. I spent most of my day wondering about the dream, why I just suddenly had a dream about melting crows. I decided to look some things up about the dream, I doubt they mean much, but it can't hurt to try.


-Melting, although I couldn't find anything specific, means that I am trying to let go or release negative emotions over a situation.
-Crows, as can be expected, represent death.
-The dead end I reached on the road may mean I've come to the end of something, and that I need to move on and work on something else.
-The fact that the crows 'melt' or 'die' means that I'm trying to get over something, or am over it.
(Source: http://www.dreammoods.com/)
Looking over those 'facts' probably means that...I'm trying to let go of Brian's death and the pain it caused me, trying to forget about him. I think that's mostly accurate, if only by chance. It is strange, really, but I think I've greatly gotten over his death, especially since this dream. I don't remember thinking about him as I usually do at the day care. Maybe I have moved on.