An Explanation

I've mostly recovered from the run-in with the owls, even though I'm still covered in scars. I asked Robbie what happened, and he told me little that I didn't already know. He said that the owls started to land in the trees near us while we were walking. Not long after all of the owls had gathered, they started to hoot before they swarmed me. They didn't attack Robbie, even when he interfered to shoo them away, they were focused on attacking me. I never knew owls to gather in this area, and never before sundown. I don't know why these horrible things took it upon themselves to attack me. No other birds were around, it seems like every other bird has vanished from this area. Robbie also said he did not recognize the owls at all, and I don't know where they could have come from. I'm at a loss about all these crazy things happening, and I'm growing more and more annoyed over it all. Robbie doesn't know how to take this situation seriously besides making sure I'm okay, and I'm tired of it.

Swarmed

...I don't know what happened. I don't know what caused it, but owls swarmed and attacked me. One moment I was walking with Robbie in the woods when I heard their constant hooting, and the next moment my vision was blinded by feathers and talons, and I was knocked to the ground. I don't remember what else happened...but I woke up at home covered in these horrible scratches. They still sting now, but Robbie is looking after me, I think I will be okay.

Utter Silence

Since being fired from my job at the day care, the birds have stayed silent. Usually by this time of year they start uttering those ghastly words all hours of the morning, evening, and whenever they get a chance. Instead, the mornings only welcome me with a fog that lasts until my classes end. I once thought that their 'singing' was calming, but I do not know why I did. If anything is worse than their singing, however, it has to be their muteness. Everything seems so dead without their ludicrous songs, even Robbie (who never notices anything) has agreed with me. It is hard to sleep knowing I won't get such a wonderful wake up call from them in the morning.

Psychopathy

Since meeting Alice, I have been focusing mainly on Schizophrenia and other Psychotic Disorders. Recently though, I've humored myself with looking up various other disorders. I found out another disorder may be a possibility in her condition-Psychopathy.

Before I go much further, I would like to point out that none of this is definitive. I can't conduct, nor prove anything about anyone's condition without being there in person-and certainly not without more education in the subject. Worth mentioning also, is that Psychopathy is often used or confused with Antisocial Personality Disorder, but the two are not exactly the same. I will be focusing only on the symptoms, and comparing them with Alice's personality.

Need of Stimulation/Prone to Boredom- Perhaps not totally true, but hasn't she written in the past how boring and dull everything is?
Shallow Emotional Response- Not responding or interpreting the emotions around her easily.
Manipulative- That 'joke' with the bird skeleton; trying to act like the skeleton was that of Roc. Manipulating the thoughts and emotions of myself.
Parasitic Lifestyle- Her inability, almost, to survive during the few days I was gone. To feed off my support.
Lack of Long Term Goals- I do not think Alice has any goals in mind.
Poor Behavioral Controls- As seen in some of her journal entries.
Lack of Empathy- Again illustrated with the bird skeleton, but also with her reaction to me losing my job.
Impulsive- I believe she thinks or acts without much, if any, planning.
Failure to Accept Responsibility for Own Actions- Perhaps not totally true, but she has not accepted or asked for forgiveness of all of her actions.

Not all of Alice's doings and reactions are psychopathic, and many other of the symptoms of psychopathy do not fit Alice exactly. I do not say she is just a psychopath, but I must point out the possibility she may be both schizophrenic and psychopathic. The correlation is not accepted as common, but that does not mean it can't exist.

Last Day

I was asked to resign at work today, or more or less I walked in to find that I had lost my job entirely. They had grown tired of my absences, so it seems. None of the children were sad to see me leave, and I can't say I felt sorry to go. Another day surrounded by their noise and Robbie's puppets would have been too much. To think that a day care full of growing children feels no sympathy for the recovering employee! I won't try to get my job back, but at least I will have more time to catch up on my studies. It is so very silent now without the noises of a bird to brighten my day, and it even the wild birds have stopped singing. Robbie said-in between his chronic apologies and puppet displays distracting me from schoolwork-that it was abnormal for them to be so quiet this time of year.

Complications

I spent my day attempting to explain to Robbie what happened while I was gone. He was both shocked and happy to see me, while I wished he would have left me alone. With my return, he's become more of a nuisance, asking me what happened, or what's wrong when I yell at him for his constant pestering. He told me how much he missed me while I was gone, and he acts like I might suddenly vanish again if he leaves me alone. Even worse, he tried to make me 'feel better' by showing me the puppets he's made recently. As cute and creative as his puppets are, I found them all the more disturbing. A grown man shouldn't be spending his days making puppets, not as obsessively as he is. I couldn't take it when he showed me some new string puppet he created, so I decided in order to prove a point, to rip the strings off of it. I guess I left him to think about what he's done, although I'm sure he'll be back tomorrow, as always, trying to make amends for what happened today.

I'm Happy They Took You Away

Remember when I ran away
And you got on your knees and begged me
Not to leave because you'd go berserk? Well...
You thought you had me fooled
But I just left you anyhow, because
I knew you were already out of your mind! And...

I'm happy they took you away, ha ha
I'm happy they took you away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha
To the funny farm
Where life's hysterical all the time
And you'll be sorry I sent those nice, young
Men in their clean, white coats
And I'm happy they took you away, HA-HAAA!

I thought that you were nuts and so I laughed
I laughed when you had said
That losing me would make you flip your lid. Right?
It's true, I laughed, you heared me laugh
I laughed, I laughed and laughed
And then I left, because I know you're utterly mad! And...

I'm happy they took you away, ha ha
I'm happy they took you away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha
To the happy home
With tree and flowers and chirping birds
And basket weavers who sit and smile
And twiddle their thumbs and toes
And I'm happy they took you away, HA-HAAA!

You burned my food, you wrecked my house
And this is how I've paid you back
For all your cruel, unloving selfish deeds! Nyeh!
They've got you now and you'll get just
What you deserve for calling me a mutt,
You mangy man!
And...

I'm happy they took you away, ha ha
I'm happy they took you away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha
To the funny farm
Where life's hysterical all the time
And you'll be sorry I sent those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And I'm happy they took you away, HA-HAAA!

To the happy home
With trees and flowers and chirping birds
And basket weavers who sit and smile
And twiddle their thumbs and toes
And I'm happy they took you away, HA-HAAA!

To the funny farm
Where life's hysterical all the time
And you'll be sorry I sent those nice, young men
In their clean white coats
And I'm happy they took you away, HA-HAAA!