Saturday, July 23, 2011

5

Something terrible happened last night. I don't know how to explain how or why, but I was in the middle of the forest. It was like a dream with everything laced in a fog, and the terrible smell of rotting flesh filled the air. It disturbed me, and I tried to run and escape from the scene as it unfolded before me, but my legs wouldn't work. They stung with more pain than I have ever experienced; I couldn't even stand up. By this time the fog was beginning to become easier to see through. As it cleared I began to see the source of the horrible smell of rotting flesh. The bodies of the children were staked high up in the trees, but as I looked up at their faces...none of them were in any pain. The remains of their faces showed only smiles and looks of absolute happiness. I can't describe them any more than that, but I wish I had never seen them. I can't tell you how much it saddens me to see such a fate befall them.

But it wasn't over..before me stood four structures that must have been long forgotten. I don't know why they existed, but the more I stared the more a sense of dread came over me. I couldn't look away from them, and even though I wanted to run from this place, I instead dragged myself forward. I crawled toward the four structures, until I felt a sharp pain in my hand. I looked down to find myself in the middle of the charred remains...of the fifth house.
The number five, is this what it means?
In my hand was a sharp shard of glass, and others like it were embedded in the dirt around me. Why was I here to see these horrible things? What was the importance of the burnt shelter, what had I done to be brought here? I received no answers to these questions. Only the terrible sense of dread lingered, and I swear..I swear I was being watched.
I wondered if this truly was a dream, and maybe the children were actually alive. Alive with their hearts impaled, blind to their terrible fate. I never want to see them again, I never want to think of that place again. I realized that the fog had now closed in around me, I could no longer the see trees and their victims. I felt more like I was being watched the less I was able to actually see.
And then I woke up, it just had to be a dream.
Only the burns on my legs say otherwise.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Understanding Alice

I am growing more and more worried about Alice every day. Anyone who has been reading her entries can see it; her psychotic states are growing worse and worse. With only being able to contact her through the internet, there is so little I can do. She avoids my e-mails, which are the only way I can try to follow her moods. I don't know what is triggering her psychotic episodes, or why they are occurring so often and so violently. Sometimes they can be triggered by mood; usually you simply do not hallucination continually. But with her entries growing worse and worse, I fear her schizophrenia will simply start to destroy her in other ways. The disorder can lead to many other disorders, and without help she could lose touch with everyone and everything around her.

The fact she has kept a job and kept up with the activities with the bird club are a miracle, but I doubt they will last. I hope if she can't trust me, she will be able to trust someone-such as Andreas. I don't know what else I can do then sit and wait, and hope that maybe she will learn to understand that I am trying to help her. I know it can become hard for her to understand things, and the longer she goes untreated the worse it will become. She won't be able to make decisions or even make use of the information given to her. I know she used to take medication, but it doesn't seem to be helping her anymore. I don't even know if she still tries to take it, or if she has decided to go untreated.

Her ways are also becoming much more confusing and disorganized. The videos she has posted, and the hidden picture are examples of this. I suspect they were supposed to be messages for me. Messages that I can't understand because I don't know where her head is. I fear she will begin to believe the delusion of that man. That Slender Man, Tall Man, or the Tailor-whatever she chooses to call him. I fear she may be trying to prove his existence, and her disorder only helps to prove it. She has already had enough of an effect on me with the number five. I have been trying to see any and all relations with the number five and my life; nothing fits. The number five has nothing to do with me directly, and yet I cannot think of anything but the number. Robbie has been trying to keep my mind off of it, he has been trying to keep me away from Alice so that I do not worry about her. But I do worry; I wish to understand what she is trying to tell me. I wish to know what is going on so that I can help her and get her to talk to me once more. If understanding what the five has to do is the key to that, then I must stop at nothing in order to figure it out.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Of Happiness

I am sorry for the lack of updates recently, but with Robbie's sickness and the other occurrences going on I have been distracted. I am happy to report that Robbie is back to normal, and with him in good health I will be able to try and focus on everything else. Nothing has come up yet about the children who went missing at the Daycare, which only unsettles me.
Alice has also remained silent to any of my inquiries on how she has been feeling and if she has been getting along alright. I am worried for her. Even worse, since finding out the hidden picture in the picture she posted, I have been unable to get the number five out of my head. What it means and what its significance is I do not know. Nothing that comes to my mind makes any sense. It is almost as if Alice is toying with me.
On a much lighter note however, I saw a bird today. The first bird I've seen since the owl attack, and it was a welcome sight. It was too far away for me to identify what sort of bird it was, but it fills me with such joy to see the return of the birds to this area. It's much more tranquil and calm with the feathered flocks flying about.